Biscuit base

I've just had a cup of tea at my desk and one of those most nostalgic of biscuits, a chocolate bourbon cream (not, as it happens, from Tesco, but could I find an image of a single biscuit in Google image search? Could I hell). I was immediately transported back in time (isn't it funny how only tastes and smells and, sometimes, music can do this? Calling all Fatfighters: I suggest a Fatfighter topic based on your most evocative food: what is it, and where does it take you?) to a party, when I was about six. I had eaten too many custard creams, which at the time were my favourite, and was sick. After that I could never touch them again (my loathing for peppermint choc chip ice cream and gin stems from similar experiences, although for the sake of propriety I must say I didn't get the opportunity to go off gin till I was in my 20s) and chocolate bourbons were the only biscuit for me, although I had a lingering fondness for those sickly sweet pink wafer biscuits.

My mum always seemed to stock the biscuit tin with the most unappealing biscuits. Frugality, and the consequent desire to preserve the biscuits by making them unappealing to young children, is the only possible explanation for why there were only ever the likes of fly cemeteries (AKA Garibaldi biscuits - this Wikipedia entry is worth a read, because it introduces the word "dysphemic", which I am rather taken with - is this a Scottish trait, do you think? - although to my surprise I had to add in the phrase "fly cemeteries"), Rich Teas (the "Lord of all biscuits"? You must be joking!) and dry flapjacks in that biscuit tin, and we usually had to wait for parties or visits to other people's houses to get a bourbon biscuit.

Until today I don't think I had eaten a bourbon biscuit for at least 10 years, possibly more, and look what it's made me remember!